The Biscuit and The Scramble (to Woo Your Rake)

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The close friendship between my buddy Sterlin and me was soldered back in high school, when we first discovered that we were the only two girls in the entire school who had never had a boyfriend (well, I guess there was “BB,” too, but we figured that sleeping with the entire senior class had to count for something).  

This revelation prompted an immediate sense of community between us, after which we spent endless hours (in the way that only teenagers can) on the telephone, musing about why we didn’t have a boyfriend, how much we wished we could have a boyfriend, what we would do if we ever got a boyfriend, and what it was other girls like BB had that we didn’t, allowing them to seemingly conjure streams of drooling boys trailing behind them like empty cans tied to a “Just Married” car bumper.  Entirely unjustly, we thought, these girls enjoyed a surfeit of boyfriends, while we had to make do with an unrequited crush on our French teacher, Mr. Krauser.

But then, we discovered historical romance novels, and our focus shifted.  You know the ones: innocent, nubile, yet spunky lass is swept away (usually literally) by swaggering, swarthy, self-assured rake with a (very well hidden) heart of gold.  Over time, he wins her devotion, while she tames his savage nature.  Well, we were spunky, weren’t we?  Sterlin and I began to daydream, starry-eyed, about meeting a similar hero (even though we never fully understood exactly what a “rake” was) and riding off into the sunset, where he’d unravel the secrets of our nascent womanhood and we would charm his wild heart.

In the books, at least, we could get close to the most desirable of men. For some reason, these novels (at least, the ones I remember) all sported titles pairing two nouns, representing male and female: there was The Wolf and the Dove,  and The Flame and The Flower (both Kathleen E. Woodiwiss masterworks) or perhaps The Raven and The Rose or The Pirate and the Pagan (both by Virginia Henley).  And let’s not forget my favorite, The French Teacher and the Girl with Braces and Long Hair Parted in the Middle Who Liked to Bake (okay, my memory may be a bit fuzzy on that one–high school was a long time ago!). 

Well, given our combined paucity of feminine wiles  flirting ability lacy lingerie boyfriend-attracting attributes, we eventually decided to woo our guys with food (the way to a man’s heart, and all that).  So Sterlin developed Date Pasta as her staple, while I attempted to perfect an ideal chocolate cheesecake, or brownie, or even muffin (since, you know, I had high hopes of my imaginary beau staying for breakfast). 

Those erstwhile romantic efforts came back to me in a flash last week after I’d been browsing through some old cookbooks. Previously, I’d had a little email exchange with Lisa (Show Me Vegan) about buying or keeping cookbooks we no longer really use, or those that contain only a smattering of recipes still relevant to our newly acquired dietary habits. 

One such tome in my collection is called The Breakfast Book, by Diana Terry (and though I’ve owned this book since the 1980s, I never realized until today that it was published in Australia–which, I may have mentioned, is the land of my dreams, with its picturesque vistas, lush wilderness, stunning cities, enviable weather, and dashing, rakish Aussie gentelmen–all of whom just happen to speak with that sexy Australian accent). 

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Ah, yes, well.  Pardon me: back to the book. Terry offers a sample menu for a brunch with a decidedly orange theme.  The lucky boyfriend guest is treated to Champagne with Grand Marnier, Scrambled Eggs with Wholemeal Brioches, Fresh Fruit with Ricotta-Orange Dip, and Viennese-Style Coffee.  Of course, none of the recipes would suit me in its present form, but that certainly didn’t stop this spunky gal.

After reading about the citrus-suffused eggs that were then gingerly ladled over a split brioche, its top placed rakishly askew, I asked myself:  “Who said tofu scrambles should be savory, anyway?  Why not sweet? And why must they always be one shade shy of neon yellow?  And couldn’t my own, homemade, biscuits stand in for a brioche? And just what does “rakishly” actually mean, anyway?”

So I created this scramble, which is slightly sweet and not too yellow.  And it’s very creamy.  And it has orange zest and juice in it.  And you ladle it gingerly over the bottom of a carob and raisin biscuit, the top of which is placed rakishly askew over it. 

And may I just say–I ended up loving this dish.  In fact, our affair bordered on the torrid.  Who needs a boyfriend?  I’d rather eat this*.  But if you’re feeling generous, go ahead and share it with your wolf, or your flame, or your rake.

[PS. Giveaway, as promised, will be announced in my next post–stay tuned!]

*Okay, not really. If I had to choose between a sweet tofu scramble and my sweet HH, of course the HH would win out.  But just barely.

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Last Year at this Time:  Raw Almond-Veggie Pâté

© 2009  Ricki Heller

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Comments

  1. Love the friendship story along with the breakfast!! :-)

  2. I love the story, it put a smile on my face this morning =)
    I’ve never thought of a sweet tofu scramble! What a great idea and the biscuit recipe looks to die for! I must get my hands on some carob powder.

  3. Who else but the wonderful Ms. Ricki could create a sweet tofu scramble?

    I want to hear more of this “The French Teacher and the Girl with Braces and Long Hair Parted in the Middle Who Liked to Bake”. It sounds like a classic! :)

  4. I’d never thought of making a sweet scramble before–interesting idea! (I’m making a savory one as I type right now :))

  5. loved the story that went along with…glad to hear that you prefer HH (slightly) over the scramble

  6. Those biscuits look fabulous! I am in a baking mood today…I think I am going to make them now!

    Courtney

  7. ..and what it was other girls like BB had that we didn’t, allowing them to seemingly conjure streams of drooling boys trailing behind them like empty cans tied to a “Just Married” car bumper. That really made me laugh, it just summed up the whole experience so well! Such a great post Ricki!

  8. Nothing like a good tofu scramble to start the day off right!

  9. i looove tofu scrambles. this one looks esp delish!

  10. ok, now you’ve really got me wondering WHY scrambles are always savory. those biscuits look fantastic as well! love the story, too, we would’ve been good friends ;-) hehe

  11. I so love your posts (like this one!), hilarious and honest and we can just so easily slip into the skin of your endearing heroines! I got into those “trashy” novels when I was entering middle school, mostly because my mum said something about them being poorly veiled porn and I had to see what that was all about! I think you’re right – ’twas always The something and The something.
    That scramble sounds good, too!

  12. Oh, my, that looks good!

  13. Love the story, especially “BB,” I think there’s one at every school. This breakfast sounds so interesting, thanks for sharing.

  14. A slightly sweet scramble? I’m sold. I’ve always only eaten savory ones and honestly, the idea of one that was sweet never even occured to me.

  15. cookingforaveganlover says:

    Yum those biscuits sound amazing!

  16. Very amusing post – brings back memories of reading Georgette Heyer as a school girl (her heroes were cads and bounders!).

    Thought I would give you some insight into the Aussie foode psyche – I recently heard that an Aussie guy I know heard an American woman mentioning ‘biscuits and gravy’ – given that our biscuits are your cookies, his head starting spinning and he couldn’t grasp the concept – so the sweet version of your scramble might just sound more understandable with a biscuit in Australia!

    And was also wondering if that orange garnish is a fancy design you do? looks impressive!

  17. Very interesting dish! I feel like the biscuits would go really well with chocolate gravy, too. ;)

  18. Haha, I adore your description of Australia! Not so sure on the rakes however or the Aussie accent being sexy :P

    I love your breakfast too! I can’t eat the scramble because of the tofu but those biscuits are a definite must try!

  19. This sounds interesting. I can imagine how good leftover biscuits would be with some jam.

  20. I think meal would win over any man!! Loved reading your story :-) Australia is also a place I dream of living!

  21. what a tasty take on the recipe, Ricki! i would have never thought to sweeten a scramble, i love the idea! and your biscuits sound too good – and too perfect with the scramble, fo ‘sho!

    i never had a boyfriend in high school – i didn’t have one until my third year of college, when i met dan. i knew then he was the boy for me – and 9 years later we’re still together. w00t! your post took me back to high school and talkin’ boys with my girlfriends. i’d also like to say that Australia = my favorite place. i visited there for a month between high school & college and fell in love with it! your post takes me back – thank you!

  22. That is one good looking scramble Ricki! I’m bookmarking this now, with the flavors and tahini sauce, so creative.

  23. this is brilliant! who knew sweet scramble would turn out so wonderfully? I’m all for torrid affairs with food. it’s totally asking for it, with its luscious…foodie stuff. yeah.

  24. Sounds lovely, Ricki.

    Rakish. Yes. It’s an odd word, isn’t it?

  25. That sounds so fantastic. Want to make it for me??? Hehe, no seriously, I will have to try it one of these weekends, it sounds totally worth it!

  26. I think we all share your BF woes….

    What a clever idea to sweeten up the scramble. I can never look past adding in tons of tortilla strips and hot salsa.

  27. I made a tofu scramble once too that was slightly sweet. It was awesome! Yours sounds more interesting though, I’ll have to try it.

  28. Congratulations on your food blog award nomination! (yippie, yahoo, yowza!)

    Who’s the A-list blogger now, ahem!
    :-)

    Couldn’t be happier for you, truly.

  29. I had the same thing in high school except there were 4 friends, two of them read the above mentioned books. It’s kinda funny because now I think how silly I was to worry so much about having a boy friend.
    Now that plate of food looks crazy yum. I’m sure the hubby will love it.

  30. What an intriguing idea! I’m definitely down with the carob-raisin biscuit, but I’ll have to warm up to the idea of a sweet (ish) tofu scramble. I mean, I’m still warming up to savory tofu scramble, after all! :)

  31. “rakish Aussie gentelmen–all of whom just happen to speak with that sexy Australian accent”

    OMGOSH! Yay! Someone else who loves the Aussie accent!!! *happy dance*

  32. I’ve never thought of doing a sweet tofu scramble before, what a great idea that I’m going to have to try this weekend!!

    I love your story about your friendship and your relationship with romance novels!

  33. Yum another delicious creation! I wish you could cook for me all the time. ;)

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