Biscuits in Need of Therapy

[This little Biscuit hates its mother.]

I’ve been spoiled rotten the past week with my friend Sterlin in town visiting from England. We’ve seen each other several times and it’s been great getting together, gabbing on the phone, laughing and commiserating, just as if we were back in high school (oh, except that three decades have passed since then, and these days we’re both partnered, and she now has three kids. . . but otherwise,  just the same). But all good things must come to an end: she heads back to the UK tomorrow.  Sob!

I decided I needed baked goods to cheer me up (because really, don’t baked goods always cheer me up?).  I had such great success with Ellen’s biscuits last week, and I’ve been eyeing this recipe for days, so my mind naturally turned to more of the same and I decided to make scones.  I knew they’d have to be grain-free (seems I’ve been fixated on grain-based baking for a few too many days lately. . . not the best idea for someone battling candida, even if they are gluten free grains). And since this month’s SOS Kitchen Challenge features sweet potatoes, I thought they’d provide a perfect base.

I set to work and, using my original grain-free biscuit recipe as a springboard, came up with what seemed like a perfect dough.  Shaped, pressed, and baked, the scones came out of the oven puffed and cracked as they should be, flirtatiously wafting their caramelized scent in my direction.  I dug in while they were still warm, slathered with coconut butter:

[This little Biscuit has an Edible Complex.]

Hmmm. Well, let’s say they were. . . . “interesting.”

When I was in my 30s, I used to think I had a lot in common with Woody Allen.  Lest you assume I am a native New Yorker, or possess a Mensa-worthy IQ and equally superior wit; or lest you imagine I am secretly a short balding Jewish man who cranks out at least one brilliant movie each year–no, those were not the commonalities to which I referred.  But I was a top-notch neurotic who could give ol’ Woody a run for his money in the therapy department.

Is it still outré to mention one’s experience with therapy? Seriously? As far as I see it, in 2010 we have almost 50% of marriages ending in divorce while only 50% of a popular chicken dish actually contains any chicken; our young people must deal with all manner of threats that I never encountered as a child; and our environment is full of potential poisons and carcinogens. With so many stressors a regular part of our everyday experience, I figure it’s a rare individual alive today who couldn’t benefit from some sort of therapy. (Then again, I draw the line at animals. Dogs on Prozac–excuse me, Reconcile?  As Amy and Seth might say, “Really, Eli Lilly?”).

And now, even my poor little biscuit requires its own analysis (on a side note, doesn’t that just sound like the cutest little sobriquet?  I think I’ll start calling the HH “Little Biscuit” from now on, just for fun).

You see, my biscuit isn’t as developed as it thinks it should be.  And it’s a little too heavy around the middle, and lacks the self-possession to remain dry all the way through under scrutiny. Personally, I think my Little Biscuit is cute as can be, and I’d even say her crumb is quite fetching (see below), but since she’s my baby, I’m biased. Sadly, the final product might not be as appealing to the general public as it was to me.

[This little Biscuit is quite the Exhibitionist.]

All this to say that my biscuits, while tasty and delicately hued, were a tad too heavy and a tad too moist to garner unconditional praise.

And so, I’m putting out an appeal to any DDD readers who would like to take this recipe and run with it:  can you determine how to transform my LB into something lighter, airier, more self-confident?  If you think you can improve on the recipe and accomplish a result that’s closer to a conventional biscuit, go for it!  Prescribe Little B’s therapy in the form of a revised recipe and I will happily bake it, photograph it, and blog about it.

In the meantime, LB will have to make due with her dwarfed size and compact interior.  It’s Vegan MoFo, after all, and who has time to bake up 7 new variations of the same recipe in one day?  😉

And don’t forget. . . the Gluten Free Holiday event is in full swing! If you’d like to enter to win one of two cookbooks, just link up your own healthier GF recipe, or use one of the other 10 ways to enter, here!

I’ll also be kicking off my “Festive Freebies” series tomorrow with a review and yet another giveaway!  This food is my new amore and I can’t wait to tell you all about it! 😀

[. . . and this little Biscuit really needs your help!]

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Last Year at this Time: Roasted Red Pepper and Apple Dip

Two Years Ago: Chili to Last Through the Winter

Three Years Ago: Gluten Free Cashew Chocolate Chip Cookies

© 2010 Ricki Heller

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Comments

  1. Oh wow, those biscuits look amazing! I love the coconut flour + sweet potato combo the most 🙂

  2. Okay, Ricki! You are hysterical! We should offer up a group therapy course for all of our baked goods gone awry. i have a few that I have tended to so dearly, only to later find that their texture and flavor did not live up to all of it’s potential. The recipe looks like these would be just fabulous. I wonder if since there is 1 1/2 cups of flour and 1/2 cup of sweet potato, that maybe the sweet potato could be cut back by a couple of tablespoons? Or since coconut flour seems to work better when there are eggs, that maybe increase the buckwheat flour to 3/4 cup and cut back the coconut flour to 1/4, or just trade out 1/4 cup of the coconut flour with some brown rice flour instead? Hmmm…now you have me thinking.

  3. Too funny, Ricki! Love the Amy and Seth “Really” reference. (That’s usually a hysterical bit on SNL!) I suspect that neurotic pets have neurotic owners. 😉

    I made some pumpkin popovers recently. I held out the same hopes, but like your biscuits/scones, mine were too heavy and not at all what I’d hoped. Great idea to ask one of your readers to take this recipe and run with it! 🙂

    Shirley

  4. sounds like you are looking for group therapy for your biscuits – ha ha! No suggestions but will get back to my gf holiday post for what it is worth

  5. Ricki, you are hilarious! Thank you, I needed a good laugh today. I think group therapy where we all bring our own biscuits would be pretty fun…or just hanging out with food & friends…I guess that’s the best therapy!

  6. What is light buckwheat flour? Any particular brand you use? I’ve only ever seen buckwheat flour at my Whole Foods.

    • I buy it at the Bulk Barn bulk store here in the Toronto area. I’m guessing it’s a little more refined than the “dark” variety. I am also guessing that Bob’s Red Mill sells it! 🙂

  7. I’m always up for a challenge! Not that I have a clue how to fix them though…

  8. I think it’s lovely that you invite us to modify your recipes, Ricki! Truly gracious and fun.

  9. Oh my goodness Ricki! You are human? Yahoo! I would gladly eat your scones any old way!

  10. Awww…good friends are the best! I hope you had a fabulous weekend with Sterlin and that the two of you will see each other again soon!

    Courtney

  11. those look absolutely beautiful. perfect for the season.

  12. Aww, poor Little Biscuits! It’s an open source recipe! But if you can’t fix it… then who? 🙂

    You get elebenty brownie points for mentioning Woody Allen! Also, I’mma have to inspect a cranberryless scone just to see exactly what they’re like. Hand it over!

  13. Ricki – you are just the best! Involving your readers to help make these biscuits better. You are the proverbial teacher, you know that? Give someone a fish and feed them for a day. Teach them to fish and you feed them for life. Okay, well maybe not fish – sub with any vegan ingredients you prefer. Beans, for example. Give someone a pot of cooked beans made from dried beans and they eat today. Teach them to soak and cook dried beans and you feed them for life. There! Asking your readers to fix these is a win-win for us all. Thank you for empowering us.

    AND thank you for the shout out for my biscuits. I’ve now made them at least 6 times and they always come out great. They are a definite on my T-giving table.

    • I’m hoping someone will actually pick up the gauntlet (or the pot holder) and give it a go–so far, no takers! And I think I’m going to have your biscuits at OUR holiday table, too–they were soooo good! 😀

  14. Thanks for the recipe. What could I substitute the soy flour for?

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